Life Updates, Humble Brags & Such

Heyyyyy friends! Happy New Year!! I know I know, I done f$#%ed up and dropped the ball on my streak of blogs but hey NEW YEAR SAME ME! We all know how I feel about New Years Resolutions, so let's not go there. If you don't know, well, then click here & afterwards come back to this.

Anyways, let's move on. Updates...here we go:

1. This past October I went to Iceland and this is as close as it gets to seeing how insanely breathtaking the world naturally is. Walking through Game of Thrones scenes may created a mild amount of bias...but it's minuscule, I swear. Also, I am okay not seeing another waterfall for a very long while, but the fact that they have too many waterfalls goes to show you how crazy pretty that country is. The people are also the kindest souls ever. I am not kidding you, they waited 30 minutes for someone who was late to the tour bus. Here in America, we question, "Why are we having all these people from shithole countries come here?"- Our president, ladies and gentleman. But seriously, they're ranked the second happiest country in the world with basically no violence/car accidents/etc etc. They're just happy in their little snow-globe. Yes, it's cold AF. SO mother effin cold but it is worth every "DEAR GOD, WHERE ARE YOU?!" that we screamed out while we were dying in the frigid outdoors. Those screams were followed by some not so nice words, especially after hiking up a glacier for 3 hours with an Ed Sheeran lookalike. Last but not least, we saw the Northern Lights dance across the night sky illuminating shades of purple, blue, and green. It was magic...pure magic. I'd show you a picture but my hands were so damn cold that I couldn't operate my camera properly. Anyway, my advice to everyone is that if you get the chance, then go to Iceland. This trip is one I will never forget for many reasons, but mainly because I got to experience it with my younger brother. Years ago, we promised that we'd never go to Iceland unless it was together and I'm so glad that it got crossed off both our bucket lists. Next item we're going after is SKYDIVING because normal people jump out of planes. Save the date if you want to join: May 19th, 2018 (Yes, this is a serious invite).

2. Can we talk about Thanksgiving and give a shoutout to all the people who host that meal at their houses because holy shit, man. IT IS A LOT OF WORK. I hosted my very first one this past November. Amateur tips: Don't pull a 6 day work week including the day that you are hosting a Thanksgiving meal. Do NOT open the oven under any circumstance while that fu*%ing bird is roasting. DO NOT set out all the side dishes unless you're 100% sure that fu*%ing bird is roasted (or else you're shoving everything back in a microwave and sobbing in a corner). ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING that can be prepped prior should be prepped prior. YOU MAY WANT TO BUY AN EXTRA OVEN OR TWO...OR THREE. People say "do not puncture the turkey skin while you're shoving butter underneath it or it'll dry out." #LifeHack buy a suturing kit & suture that fu*%ing bird (Yes, I sutured a turkey). Don't forget about the stuffing inside the turkey because Lord knows, I'm still salty about throwing that away. If people ask you if they can bring anything, don't play superhero, ask for help (Shoutout to all my friends, you guys are incredible. God bless you! I love you!). A special shoutout to my guy for helping me with every.single.thing. starting from grocery shopping, to chopping celery, to dealing with my meltdown post-turkey-struggle, to helping me clean up. You're the real MVP and I love you for it.

3. Speaking of boyfriend circa Thanksgiving 2017, he still exists but *drum roll please* now as my fiancé. Yep, I AM ENGAGED (I know, I know, what the F$%*!) Please read my previous blogs for references as to how sarcastically cynical non-mushy-gushy of a person I am, so ya, this is kind of a big deal for me. Readers, meet Elias. Little bit about bae; HIS EYES! Okay okay, I'll be serious now... THOSE TEETH! Okay okay, forreal along with that smile comes a fellow-OCDer. Elias is a project engineer, and as you all know, I'm a dentist so it only makes sense that we work well; we can handle each other's insane over-the-top detail oriented nature AKA we're both crazy and our children are going to need therapy. He's also Orthodox-Christian, which is HUGE to me because faith plays a vital role in my life. He can dance, I mean, really dance. In fact, there's a strong chance you'll find him on a stranger's snap story at a party. He has the appetite equivalent to that of Fat Bastard from Austin Powers but the metabolism of Shaggy from Scooby Doo. He's also one of those people who you find instant comfort being around because of how genuine and honest he is (shoutout to your parents, babe). To top it all off, my family likes him probably more than they like me. I don't want to brag (low-key kind of do), so I'll just leave it at this: I couldn't have ever imagined having someone as incredible as this man to call my future husband. Okay fine, he's not that awesome, he has horrible road rage. Moving on...but first, LOOK AT HIM!!!!

4. Wedding planning has commenced and it is not all that it is cracked up to be nor is #adulting (The hell were we in a rush for?!) No, we are not getting married this year, it'll be summer of 2019 (date tbd). Yes it's kind of early to start but remember when I said we're both OCD and detail oriented. Needless to say, this should get interesting. Stay tuned.

XOXO

I need to stop dropping f-bombs.